Paper

Grad school?  Pff, whats that?  Apparently I'm not good enough...haha, no, that's not really it at all.  I'm good enough.  I'm competitive.  Just not competitive enough for the slim pickings of positions that are out there.  I'm going to be graduating in an absolute rut.  I have applied; I have polished my experience to the best of my abilities since I've been in college; I am a master at writing cover letters now.  Transcripts were paid to be sent, GRE scores paid to be sent, letters of recommendation written and sealed, cover letters and CVs were printed and mailed.  So much paper, a couple trees I'm sure...but all of this?  Not enough to cut it in today's society with funding being what it is.  Bah.  Money, you are the bane of my existence.  I wonder almost daily why we have to have money?  I mean look at it, just pull a dollar out and really look at it for a moment.  Feel it.  Bend it, crinkle it.  Its just a silly piece of paper (and other such materials).  Paper.  We get all bent out of shape for pieces of paper.  It seems silly when I think about it so in depth, and yet, there it is, money.  Can't escape it...

So, I'm coming to terms with where I'm gonna go, what I'm gonna do after May 15th.  May 15th.  Man, that's scary.  The official end to my undergraduate career.  Dawning a gold robe, tassels, and the like, strutting across a stage *without falling embarrassingly*, taking a[nother] piece of paper from an individual I likely have never met or interacted with in my four years at WVU (the bane of a big school).  And this piece of paper?  Its gonna tell the world that hey, look at this chick, she did college.  Really did it.  Y'know?  Bachelor of Science (hopefully with honors) in Biology.  And that piece of paper?  I'm sure my parents will frame it and add it to the growing wall of accomplishment in my bedroom at home.  Safe-keeping it with my HS diploma and swimming achievement plaques until I find a place of my own some day...

A place of my own?  I don't know where or when that will take place.  After May 15th I don't really know what I'll be doing.  I have more papers to compose undoubtedly.  Cover letters, CVs, and any other possible nonsense required for me to attain a temporary position somewhere.  I'm thinking I'll try for a summer position lasting 3 or so months somewhere near-ish.  I plan to take weekend classes to get my OEC certification requirement (aka another little piece of paper saying I did something) to become a national ski patroller this winter.  After three-ish months of some (hopefully fun) job, I think I'd like to return to Morgantown.  Find another silly job for awhile doing something I don't want to do forever.  Hang out.  Bide time.  Enjoy friends.  And then, then I'll try to snag a job of significance.  Another temporary one undoubtedly, but by this time I'll be a certified ski patroller (and that comes with more than just a piece of paper, I get a fancy red jacket oooohhhh yeeaaahhhhh).

With time I'll be somewhere doing something awesome.  I've got five years before my GRE scores expire.  Five years to get back and complete a Master's.  Five years to play.  Five years to add more pages to my CV.  To add more ink to paper.  All this paper though?  All these words that claim I did something, achieved something, got somewhere?  Its more than just words on paper.  Its experience.  Its memories.  Its priceless skill I have gained with hands-on experience.  Its building me into me.  And you know what?  Its gonna be a blast.