Homebody

The forced slow down of life due to the COVID-19 pandemic has been quite a welcome change for me. For most of the last decade, I have excelled at over-committing myself and my time. In hindsight, it only increased my natural tendency to be anxious and resulted in a lot of undue stress and worry. I wanted to make a concerted effort this year to slow down and find better balance within my life with the hope that I could eliminate much of my anxiety for good.

I've been doing a great job slowing down since the start of the year. The majority of my weekends have been completely free of prior commitments/obligations, and I've been spending a significant portion of my time reading - oh, and taking naps! I've become a bit of a homebody and I don't hate it.

Sunrise rays hitting Canaan Mountain

In a lot of ways, I've been inadvertently prepping myself to be physically distanced from other humans. (I don't feel like "social" distancing is accurate, I'm plenty social still! It is all just digital.)

It helps immensely that I have a job I can do from home indefinitely, my horses are home with me, and I live in the middle of nowhere. My good fortune is not lost on me for one moment. I am so, so, so very grateful for each of these things, and I recognize that they each enable me to have infinitely less anxiety as a result of this whole ordeal.

I can't remember the last time Dave and I took a leisurely walk around the neighborhood together 

But all the same, I needed this slow down. I needed to be better at embracing my inner homebody. Better at taking time to myself instead of sharing it constantly. My mind is still busy, but not at the lightspeed pace it was forced to maintain for so long. And that is a most welcome change.

Now, I read all the time. I sit still and sip my morning tea. I putter around the house watering plants. I slowly muck the dry lot and stalls without hurrying through the task. And I am so very excited to start the seeds I collected from last summer's flowering plants this weekend.

I'm going to continue to do my best to embrace this homebody nature as the next month of physically distancing continues. These small tasks around home are things I can control amidst a world in chaos. And it feels good to do something in my control that gives me a little happiness.

Stay well, y'all. 💚