However, there have been some changes regarding my confidence (it's in the 50-90% range now) doing certain things on horseback that I want to revert. All of these particular changes that I'd like to reverse are minor. I could certainly live without them. But - there's always a "but" - I think life will be more FUN if I can teach myself to be 100% confident enjoying them again.
Being an adult has introduced so many more responsibilities and checks and balances to life, y'know? And I have [unfortunately] let that responsibility [and the act of adulting] seep a little too much into my horse life. It's more structured/regimented as a result. And that's great most of the time. But I could definitely stand to let loose a little more. Horseback riding should be fun first and foremost, (okay, well, maybe after assuring it is safe, but safety should be a given before one pursues most activities).
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| Trot poles. An approved structured activity. |
And so, in that vein, I made a goal for myself this year to [re]master the art of galloping on Griffin. If that goes well I'd love to reach a point where I could do the same with Q. She's the one who killed my confidence galloping full-bore because she's got a penchant of stopping on a fucking dime the moment something scares her. This leads to me inevitably taking QUITE a tumble. Just ask me how I know...
And of course, I still gallop on Stan. I've already been galloping almost every ride on him. But this is because I have history with him that includes a wealth of trust, so it's easier to let loose.
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| Griffin asking to canter with much more gusto than desired in the moment as I tell him, "No. Not yet." |
I've begun to incorporate short gallop sets in my work with Griffin lately in my quest to find comfort galloping again. The biggest challenge for me is to not mentally micromanage the situation, Is that a hole? Will he trip? Will he spook? These thoughts are minor and don't cause me anguish at all. They do result in calmly acquiescing to remain in a nice 3-beat gait or a controlled hand gallop as opposed to letting loose into a full-bore gallop. I basically talk myself out of doing something before I've even started. And I've done this so much in recent years that I've created a habit of staying in my controlled comfort-zone.
But no more!
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| Kenai is my favorite part about this photo |
Griffin LOVES to boogie and gallop. And he's pretty gaddamn trustworthy, too. (Read: doesn't make up fake monsters to spook at and drop his rider.)
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| Flyinggg. And yes, I pursued this entire effort in a dressage saddle. *shrug* |
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| Move out! |
I definitely squeal with delight when he really buckles down and launches forward at the beginning. But then I relax and go with it.
And honestly, from the photos you'd be hard pressed to recognize a rider who questions what is going on. I'm balanced and working with Griffin nicely. Which I think I knew, but I wouldn't really admit it to myself until I saw it in photos, y'know?
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| Small but mighty...and also trying to veer off the designated path. |
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| Speed racer |
I'm so relaxed physically, that when Griffin decided to LAUNCH us over this ditch with more gusto than ever before, I just squeaked in surprise and we carried on.
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| A normal launch over the ditch. |
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| The *surprise!* monster launch over the ditch |
He's a damn good horse. And I think he's going to absolutely love doing XC one day.
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| Smile says it all. |
So, how about you - what horse-related things do you miss doing now that you used to do as a kid/teenager? Where is your confidence at a lesser percentage than it once was? Have you created a habit of talking yourself out of certain things before even trying?
I have never been a brave rider, even as a kid, so I'm not sure I have a "better" confidence level to try to re-attain. Pretty sure out of all my old trainer's students, I would be the one voted as "least likely to be an endurance rider."
ReplyDeleteI have a hard time being comfortable at speed...I've been offloaded too many times by a sudden stop or a drop-n-swerve that I'm very cautious and have a very hard time letting a horse go. I also micromanage in terms of always looking for a hole or rough footing and preemptively slowing down versus trusting the horse to get us safely through or use good judgment.
I think I used to be braver in that when I regularly took lessons, having someone direct me gave me more confidence, as well as something to focus on other than making up stories and asking for trouble in my own head.
I think it's pretty incredible that despite being the least likely endurance rider, you have gone out there and done just that with great success!
DeleteNow I want someone to come take pics of me galloping across a field! (Although I doubt we will look nearly as composed as you and Griffin!)
ReplyDeleteGirl, you got a drone. Get busy galloping for video! Re-enact the LOTR scene where Liv Tyler gallops away from the scary black Friesians. It could be epic!
DeleteOmg I hadn't even considered that.... Now I need to get Ruby accustomed to the drone -- I barely trust Cinna cantering in an arena, galloping in a field is not in our near future 😂
DeleteBy the time you're comfortable galloping Cinna she'll be light enough in color to replicate this: http://pre07.deviantart.net/03bb/th/pre/i/2010/103/0/a/arwen__s_ride_by_nothorn.jpg Wrap up one of the doxies to serve as Frodo 😂😂😂
DeleteI'm crying 😂😂😂 I don't think I'd ever trust her enough to gallop tack-less, but maybe one of those white biothane Friesian bridles..... Haha
DeleteI'll still do (almost) anything on Tristan, but I have - as you called it - that well of trust with him. Where I've lost confidence is with new horses, or different horses. I used to ride whatever lesson horse I pulled that week, or throw a leg over friends' horses when they are out of town. I can't remember the last time I rode a strange horse, and it makes me nervous to think about doing so.
ReplyDeleteWell, if you're down in these parts, you're welcome to Griffin. He's a pretty trustworthy fella ;-)
DeleteLove the matching smiles! Since I only started riding 2.5ish years ago I don't really have a young-aged me comparison haha Most of my riding confidence has been instilled thanks to Quest- I learned how to canter with her...and pretty much everything else so far tbh. But I do miss taking lessons and trying out (safe/sane) new-to-me horses and seeing what they can teach me.
ReplyDeleteIt is so outstanding that you've learned to ride so well in such a short time! That will never cease to be remarkable to me. You're such a natural.
DeleteGood for you! I'm hoping to feel more relaxed about jumping eventually... it's slowly coming along :)
ReplyDeleteYou'll totally get there! You've got three great mounts to pursue it with, too, which triples your chances for success, yeah? Haha.
DeleteI don't know how you managed to gallop in a dressage saddle but you look fantastic. :-)
ReplyDeleteHaha, thanks! I love that saddle. It's a late-2004 treeless Ansur and is simply the most comfortable saddle ever; I have competed almost all of my endurance miles in it.
DeleteI LOVE THESE PHOTOS! You look gorgeous and balanced and full of JOY! THE BEST!! I was definitely way more ballsy as a teen than I am now, but the trust I have in Dino has allowed me to enjoy the 'fun stuff' again and let me work on my bravery. I'm thrilled to say that I am now riding him bareback w/t/c all over our farm, up and down (steep!) hills without a care in the world. Until very recently, cantering him bareback in a small ring definitely scared me, so this is just an awesome development! I love, love, love how you are finding your guts and your joy again galloping Griffin!!
ReplyDeleteYou and Dino have a relationship that is definitely #goals. I had no idea that you'd come so far re: bareback and comfort with that - you seem like such a pro! Great work.
DeleteGalloping on Gem would be amazing....and a death wish. I just have zero trust that she won't kill me. I used to gallop all over the place when I was younger. Me thinks I need a non Arab as my next mount to regain that confidence.
ReplyDeleteYou look perfectly suited to Griffon and the two of you will rock xc some day
Nonarabs definitely have a calmer demeanor for the most part! Though I do know many Arabs bonded closely with their owners who have the same calm demeanor with their human. Just gotta work for it more, I suppose. I'm grateful to have 3 very different dynamics with my horses; makes me appreciate each of them more.
DeleteSuch awesome galloping pictures!! Galloping is so much fun. I need to put more fun back into my riding. I've been working on just letting loose and having fun with my ponies. Ive lost a bit of the cruising around for fun since I started working and riding horses as a job. It's so nice to destress from the day by having a 'fun' ride on my ponies with no goal in mind.
ReplyDeleteFun rides with no goal in mind are so relaxing. I am trying to actively make time for more of that this year. I think it'll benefit all of us haha.
DeleteAhhhh I ❤️ Everything about this haha. Galloping is just the best, and building that freedom and trust to push on and move out with a horse is so liberating!! Can't wait to see you guys out flying across country!!!
ReplyDeleteIt'll be awhile before we're flying cross country, but I know when it happens I'll probably have permagrin from the experience.
DeleteI've also got that 'let it loose' fear because Gwyn is not quite controllable at anything past a trot. I was getting better when I had hay fields to ride the perimeter of. I don't really have a good open space to let loose right now.
ReplyDeleteOpen space is definitely key, but you're right, it's so hard to find! I hope you have some space open up to you in the future so you can let loose and enjoy =)
DeleteI am a very, very timid rider. It got worse after I saw my mother have a terrible accident on a horse that we had rescued - she nearly died. She was knocked unconscious, and ended up with a brain bleed. Seeing that terrified me and I've been scared to canter ever since because my horse is known to buck at the canter. I get a sick feeling every time I try to canter. After a few minutes, it eases and I have fun. It's something that I am determined to work through this year.
ReplyDeletewww.baysoverbaes.wordpress.com
My first time cantering led to me falling off and hitting my head hard on a gravel road. Fortunately, I was wearing a helmet and was no worse for the wear! I wore a helmet religiously thereafter (until I was 18 when I decided to rebel a few years, but I wasn't riding often because of college fortunately.) It took me years to get my confidence back cantering, but I practiced a lot in a controlled arena space and it got easier the more I worked at it. You'll get there!
DeleteSadly, I think this is something that happens to all adults sooner or later. (Some of them are just better at hiding it than others.) For me personally, I can pinpoint the exact moment that shook my confidence (you get one guess). It has come back to about 90%, but there are still times when I wish I could be fearless like I used to be.
ReplyDeleteI think that's what I miss most about Ozzy. There is no other horse that I trust the way I trust him and I miss galloping him on a loose rein in wide open spaces. We did a little bit of it on our 17 mile ride in November and I almost cried because it felt so good to do it again. I gallop other horses on the endurance trail (Moniet and Steel in particular), but even when I do let them all the way out, there's this little nagging voice in my head that goes, "This isn't safe." I want that voice to go away.
I find that relationships are what makes that trust and fearlessness possible. The downside of my work is that I don't get to know the horses as well as I do with my own horses. Booger is starting to teach me to have confidence in myself again. She is a good girl and I know her so well now, but she's not 100% trustworthy, and sometimes she acts out. Being able to ride through her antics without fear (she does the Q teleport, among other things) has bolstered my confidence, especially this year.
I am so thrilled that Griffin is giving you your confidence back. I know Q shook you pretty well somewhere along the way. I think Stan's coming back into your life was destiny and is going to open even more doors for you and your amazing little gray. Plus, the photos are EPIC.
I second wanting that voice to go away! I hear it and I think about how if I fell in X moment that I'd probably be hurt and unable to do all of the other things I love in life for months. And so I mitigate whatever I'm doing, dialing it down to the point where the voice doesn't persist.
DeleteBoo's personality is what I hope Q evolves into when our relationship is repaired fully. We're definitely getting there. I do regret that the relationship ever had to dissolve like it did for me to learn how to be better, but I'll never repeat the error again in the future!
For me, the voice talks about the bills I won't be able to pay if I can't ride/teach. The last time I got hurt nearly bankrupted us, and our bills are four times what they were then! Stupid adulting :(
DeleteBoo is a witch, honestly. Q's personality is much nicer than Boo's. I have to work for every ounce of progress with her. I love her dearly, but I think people would be shocked if they met her. All the things we do look really impressive from the outside, but she tells strangers off and our rides are definitely a compromise 99% of the time. Haha.
I second Dom on the voice: mine talks about the bills I wouldn't be able to pay if I can't stand on my own two feet or use both arms to do my job. Hence why with my three worst accidents, I didn't even go to the doctor: I didn't want them to tell me what I couldn't do, and I didn't want to know how bad it was because then I wouldn't be able to plod on. Seems counterintuitive, but given that I was going into the first week of work at a new job each of those times, suddenly telling them I needed 4+ weeks off to recover for an injury after just being hired was not a choice. Adulting sucks all the way around.
DeleteBeing able to gallop out in the open was an enormous, enormous feat for me. As a young rider, it only really happened when flying over a jump-off course (thanks to the personal horse barely having a canter because Paso Fino), or the handful of times some horse I was being the guinea pig for, bolted and ran away with me, sometimes with me hanging off the side of their neck...
Galloping with confidence is definitely something which is limited to my horses (as you mentioned, it's that well of trust! :)) and only when I feel safe re: the terrain, the environment around us, and the horse's mindset at that moment in time.
I texted you immediately when this post went up, but I want to say it again: I loved this post so much! The photos are epic and seeing that confidence of yours that I admired so much, make a comeback in your riding, made me grin from ear to ear. <3
<3 One day we'll gallop side by side again. I know we did it shortly on Wye Island, but even then I held back! Gotta move past that...and find a legit huge beach to enjoy at a flat out gallop....BAREBACK. #goals
DeleteSome day, all three of us will gallop all out... hopefully on the way to our top ten finish at a 100!
DeleteIt's amazing how quickly confidence can shrink when you get out of practice with something (I'm going through something similar hiking our "big" mountains) and how hard it can be to get started towards getting it back. Kudos to you for making and implementing a plan! These are beautiful pics and I look forward to following your further adventures at speed. :)
ReplyDeleteYou'll rediscover your big mountain confidence in short order, I know it! Your past writings and photos tell of your love of them and that kind of thing doesn't just go away for good. ;-)
DeleteI was never a super confident rider, and as I've aged I've gotten more timid. I don't think I've ever really galloped on any horse!
ReplyDeleteI hope you'll partner with a horse who gives you the confidence to gallop one day. It's amazing.
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