Thursday, July 20, 2017

Fluid Planning

Originally, I'd planned to hit up two of Loch Moy's Twilight Eventing nights this summer: July 26 and August 30. I took work off and had everything squared away, yet I held off sending in my entry for the first one.

I wanted to first wait and see how XC schooling and the dressage show went last weekend. I figured that would solidify feelings of certainty about entering and help determine which level I would sign up for.

The XC schooling and dressage show went well! Obviously. I came home feeling more confident about making a true eventing debut 2½ weeks later at Loch Moy. But then I started really looking at the calendar, my work schedule, my free time schedule, and all the responsibilities that come with life.

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Temporary pasture home, beautiful, no?

Non-horse chaos aside, I needed to find time to work both Griffin and Stan. Griffin needed steady dressage schooling and jumping; Stan needs miles, miles, miles. Because I have someone else (Lauren, the junior I'm mentoring for endurance) relying on me for the RBTR commitment, I can't let Stan's conditioning slide more than it already has. (Ahahaha, we're gonna wing this ride so hard.) But I also don't want to let Griffin's schedule slip away to nothing in the short time before the July 26 event!

Additionally, my work life is a steady state of stress lately and I have had a lot of family commitments and photo gigs lately. I'm managing to climb every weekend right now, barely, but mountain biking has definitely been taking a back seat, which makes me a little sad. It's been hard to balance work life with personal life with horse life lately!

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Yin and yang in the backyard temp pen

So perhaps you can see where this is going.

Something had to give.

Something had to give soon or I was going to swirl ever downward into the maelstrom of chaos that comes from juggling far too many balls at once. The fire wasn't hot enough to balance all the irons I'd put in it. I needed to put some balls down and take some irons out of that fire if I was going to keep my sanity.

And so I made the best decision I could that would single-handedly resolve the whole mess of things, even though it meant giving up something I was really excited about: I opted to not go to the July 26 event.

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Channeling zen aka holding back a fire-breathing grey horse; yes, this is the view from my neighborhood. I love my home.

By doing this, I was able to move my leave at work around to provide myself more time to move the horses, more time to condition Stan, more time to focus on strengthening weaknesses with Griffin, more time to relax between my various preexisting commitments, and I'd save some money to boot.

Balancing the workout schedule of multiple horses is hard. Balancing a competition schedule with multiple equestrian disciplines is hard. Both of those things are infinitely harder to balance when you take into account the various other life responsibilities, work responsibilities, financial restraints, personal relationships, and mental peace of mind that one needs to keep moving forward each day.

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When using a neck collar, you can really see the Arabian side of Q.
And those big ol' ears!

Fluid planning, and being willing to cancel plans, is the best approach when you've got as many passions and hobbies as I do. I enjoy being busy and doing All The Things, but sometimes I have to cancel certain plans to fulfill others. It's not always easy to make the decision, but I can say with complete confidence that I always feel infinitely better after I make such hard decisions.

There are - and there will continue to be - plenty more opportunities to get out there with Griffin and pursue this eventing dream. We'll get there when we're meant to and it'll be all the sweeter when we do.

How about you - how do you balance horses with the rest of life? Have you had to make any hard decisions lately?

29 comments:

  1. "Both of those things are infinitely harder to balance when you take into account the various other life responsibilities, work responsibilities, financial restraints, personal relationships, and mental peace of mind that one needs to keep moving forward each day."

    This. So much this. I don't think I've read a line in a blog that I've related to so much in weeks. Although you do an infinitely more admirable job at balancing it than I do! <3 I'm sad you had to give up the July show, but sounds like the best option for all you've got going on. And as my husband likes to remind me -- there will always be more shows! :)

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    1. So many more! And yeah, I have definitely noticed how busy you've been this year! It's really hard to balance everything. I dunno about you, but I always seem to think it will "slow down" or "get better" and inevitably I fill my time with other things regardless lol. C'est la vie. I'd rather have a full life than an empty one. Scheduling downtime DOES help though.

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  2. May I ask why Q wears a neck collar? Is it an alternative to wearing a halter in turnout? I've never seen that before :)

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    1. She and Grif were in a temp pen and were really itchy with their halters on. I converted their throat latches (halter-bridles) that have my phone number on them into neck collars so that they could be less itchy and still have my information attached to them in case something happened and they got out. I typically don't like to leave anything on my horses in turnout, but as they weren't in their home environment and the temp fence is easily torn down in a panic, it was the best bet. They're very accustomed to a lot of things being attached to them over the years so I knew these wouldn't bother them at all.

      Another aside: endurance riders in ridecamp will somes put neck collars on horses that are attached to hi-tie systems. I've also know some pack horses to wear them on trail and even more horses to use them in camp when on a hi-line. If you've got a mellow critter that responds well to pressure/release, they'll probably work for you/the horse. Doesn't beat a halter, but works for some situations.

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  3. so brita rachael and i just had a long conversation this very morning about balancing our lofty ambitions for this upcoming fall season with the reality of our day to day lives. and... yea. some stuff has crashed back down to earth despite our best intentions. c'est la vie, tho. better to feel balanced physically and emotionally than try to cram everything in and potentially pay the consequences.

    re: my own loch moy plans, idk if i'm going to make it to any of the twilights with charlie, but i'll certainly try to at least make it on foot if you're going! i'll also be missing the first of their fall series with charlie (we had already committed to fair hill the day prior) but again, will do my damnedest to be there on foot if you go. we're aiming for the october and november events there for sure tho! good luck with balancing everything!

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    1. Feeling balanced physically and emotionally is so important to finding success with horses, I find. If I'm stressed to the nines, I rarely have a good ride. I can't expect my horses to give me their all if I can't check-in fully during our sessions. Tricky little dance, but worth it to keep relationships thriving and learn new things.

      Tentative plan is Aug. 30 Twilight, Sept. and Nov. trials. I'll be banding raptors for the Oct. one!

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  4. That balance is so hard to find but so necessary! In the beginning of the year I put EVERY SINGLE SHOW on my calendar that I might even remotely want to go to, knowing full well that many, many, many of those events will get scratched out as other things take priority. While our horses and competing them are huge, important commitments, sometimes we need to take a step back and care for ourselves and our families. There have been times where I just get fried and exhausted, and shows get stricken from the calendar just so I can rest! It's a bummer that you won't be making it to the twilight events, but that just gives you more time to practice and hone your skills before your first HT!

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    1. I take the same approach putting down all possible events. It helps with planning to know what my options are even though I know damn well I won't make it to many of them. It's a delicate balance sometimes for sure.

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  5. Ugh. Life balance is the thing I struggle with most as well. This whole year has felt like making one hard decision after another, and it's really starting to get to me. I think any decision that makes you happy and leaves you with more energy is a good one. I'm always here for you! <3

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    1. Hard decisions are SO taxing. I've found that scheduling down time really helps me. I've had a lot of weekends this year that I make a point of NOT committing to something so that I can relax if I want to. I often end up doing things locally anyway, but not feeling any obligation to be anywhere is sometimes just the break I need. I know you'll be traveling to visit soon, but hopefully once you're here you can find some relaxation and recharge. Cold mountain rivers may help revive you some, too. ;-)

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  6. I honestly am not sure how you manage to have three horses and so many hobbies. I have one horse and like one other 'full-time' hobby of running and I feel busy. Summer always seems to involve more compromise for me too. The husband and I enjoy camping and fishing a lot so Mort gets several weekends off throughout the summer while we run away from reality. In the long run training in the dead heat of summer is gross anyway so Mort certainly isn't any worse off. It's all about balance and keeping ourselves healthy and happy!

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    1. I bet Mort loves having time off during the dog days of summer! I have found that when I give myself time away from the horses to balance other parts of life they always seem to come back to work just as renewed as I do. I think we forget how much vacations/downtime can benefit our horses. I'm trying to add time off for my guys more consciously now because I've seen how much they benefit from it.

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  7. I used to be some militant about DO THIS THEN DO THIS THEN DO THIS and never take a break. The last couple years have been educational in terms of finding a work/life balance and learning how to actually relax. Frankly, I have no idea how you handle multiple horses/disciplines. The very idea makes my brain spin.

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    1. It used to make my head spin, too! And I used to be really militant about all of my things. I'm learning to flow better and be less hard on myself as time goes on though. It's still a balance and a dance at times, but I'm learning and getting better. Learning to relax is SO important; I don't know why it can be so hard to do at times!

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  8. Life balance is hard. The horses had to give this year, given the level of commitment my new competition goals require. I was still debating doing the Fort Valley LD in October...but I've really enjoyed taking this year off from endurance. I hadn't realized how much it stressed me out until I stopped doing it. I might return to it, or I might not. I'm having too much fun with this right now, and it's been a gateway to exploring so many other aspects of fitness I wanted to dabble in: running, HIIT, lifting heavy, working with a trainer, focusing on eating for MY performance. I'm happy I've been able to balance it out with my other relationships and setting time aside for strict downtime to just enjoy life.

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    1. I can tell just how much fun you're having with your new endeavors, too! Your enjoyment is contagious and I find myself being better about scheduling workouts after seeing your IG posts. I think the parallels between your endurance prep/training and your personal fitness goals this year are super cool, too.

      The good thing about taking time off from any hobby or discipline is that it's still gonna be around later; if we're truly called to it and miss it we can go back. For awhile my brain wouldn't connect that for some of my hobbies. It's been a nice realization to come to though and funnily enough, with that realization I've had an easier time flowing between so many things without feeling the stress of them.

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    2. "The good thing about taking time off from any hobby or discipline is that it's still gonna be around later; if we're truly called to it and miss it we can go back." <- Yes! Very much yes! <3

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  9. I'm looking at my upcoming schedule (now to October) and thinking that I really need to do some cancelling of my own. Unfortunately, other people are relying on me for almost every single plan I have on the calendar. Boo-hiss!

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    1. Boo hiss indeed!! Makes me think of the Jim Carrey "Yes Man" film. Being open to so many things and saying "yes" is fun....until it really, really isn't. Need some "No Man" in your life, too, to you know, survive?! lol

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    2. Agreed. My problem is also that the more I say no, the more I can't pay my bills. Yay self employment!

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  10. Yup, I hear you about the whole #adulting thing. It can be hard to try and get everything done - it always seems like one thing or another gets left behind or dropped. I think it helps to be more fluid in your methods - being able to change plans and accept those changes really helps.

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    1. #adulting is the worst. I look at preteens who don't even work yet and still get to enjoy their summer break however they please for the most part and think, "You don't even know how good you have it." but then I remember the cliques and the hormones and I question how good they have it lololol

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    2. My Facebook "On this Day" app likes to remind me just how much riding I was doing back in High School. And I think, "I wish I could leave the office right now..." and then I remember back in High School I didn't have a vehicle or a license and most of my statuses were me bitching about how I couldn't go ride, lol!

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  11. Dang. I hate when real life gets in the way of horse life, but unfortunately it is unavoidable sometimes. Your place is INCREDIBLY beautiful btw, I am jealous! -Kelly @ Hunky Hanoverian

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    1. Thank you! West Virginia is Almost Heaven <3 We're lucky up here.

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  12. Balancing is so hard. Stepping away from endurance and moving toward arena based disciplines was one massive art of compromise for me. I couldn't make endurance fit into my family time and Wyatt time never gets put on the back burner for my hobbies. It was either change disciplines or stop riding.

    I'm sorry you had to cancel the first show, but I know you will still enjoy RBTR with Stan and hit the next one running.

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    1. I LOVE endurance but it can be so time consuming! When Q is legged up and in shape, I don't have a problem maintaining her, but the legging up is so, so much work. It's so wonderful to have versatile horses that can jump between disciplines so that we're able to morph our equestrian goals to better fit our non-equestrian lifestyles.

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  13. I'm sorry you're not going to the show. I also try to do endurance and eventing and this year endurance is definitely losing. But I am still hoping to get at least one ride in this year.

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    1. Youvamaze me with how much you fit in each year!

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